Sitting here watching my husband rock my daughter to sleep for a nap, it is difficult to forget just what my priorities are.
Sure, having a million dollar business would be great.
Being on the cover of Forbes before I hit 30 would be amazing.
Revolutionizing the world would be incredible.
But so is that moment when I pick up my little girl and she smiles at me.
So is that moment when I’m half asleep and we bring her into bed with us, and she falls asleep in my arms.
And that moment when she looks up at me as if I’m her whole world means way more than revolutionizing the world ever could.
I can have a million dollar business and cause a revolution without giving up my priorities, it will just take focus and planning. I have to design my life by my priorities, not design my life for success and fit my priorities in where I can.
What are your priorities? Is your life designed for them, or around them?
Do you know what the most commonly viewed post is on this site to date?
10 Tips to Clean a House in Under an Hour.
Out of over 3,000 unique views that this site has received since its inception, 12% of all visitors came here solely for that article.
I didn’t intend for that post to become the biggest content draw to my site, nor did I intend for it to end up doing well in the search engines. I just wrote the post because I was nesting, strapped for time, and don’t like cleaning.
Right now, my house is a disaster. I wish I had an hour to clean, but I don’t. And that doesn’t make me a bad person, but it does mean that my readers have their priorities straight – and I don’t.
Business success is important to me and to my family. I want to make an impact, help people, and support my kids. If I want my daughter to go to private school and get a good education, flipping burgers will barely pay her tuition and our rent. Entrepreneurial success is something I strive for.
But these 60+ hour weeks lately have been absolutely killing me. I never get to spend any time with my lil’ fluff monster (as we speak, grandma and grandpa are over watching her and cleaning my house so I can get work done – all because hubby had to take off with little warning to work tonight), I feel stressed and tired, and I am burning out fast.
I’m on a hamster wheel – must get work to feed family. Must cook food for family. Must buy more food – need more work. Squeak, squeak, squeak…
But I’m getting out of it. I’m going to re-learn how to clean my house in under an hour. I’m going to rediscover what it means to cook a “quick dinner”. I’m going to make my bed in the morning, play with my daughter, keep up the house, and not kill myself at work.
I know how to clean my house in under an hour, and you guys come to me for that.
Now I need to learn how to run my business in less than 10 hours a day. I wonder if there is a blog somewhere else, just like me, who posted how to do that?
That is a mantra I keep repeating to myself.
What are my goals?
What is important to me?
What do I value?
What do I believe in?
Today, I have three separate projects to work on that require immense amounts of focus and attention – all while keeping in mind the looming need for family time on Halloween. My back is sore, my shoulders are tight, my stomach in knots fearing the worst about several bills coming due that have yet to be paid – and yet, in the face of any and all adversity… I just keep working on what matters to me.
What matters to me is my family, and entrepreneurs. YOU matter to me. Your success matters to me. Your ability to make a living while doing something you love matters to me.
So instead of a trick, I’d like to offer a treat. What is your most pressing entrepreneurial question? Post it in the comments here, and I’ll gladly give you the best advice I can.
Hopefully that advice will allow you to continue on – in the face of any and all adversity.
Today I had the experience of discovering my own personal power.
Hubby and I have been working on our “pretirement” vision of our life. What would that look like? Family time, travel, community contribution, outdoor time, friends, entertaining, and fun.
We had been toying with the idea of going to Alberta to visit family for Thanksgiving for awhile now. The opportunity came up to go with my in-laws, but there were obstacles… First, we had to have the money to go. Then, they didn’t have the money unless we were able to contribute more. Through it all, we persevered, kept our intention to go, and so – we’re leaving Saturday morning.
Considering this will be our first trip anywhere since July 2008, that is a pretty big change for us. And we just created it – set our intention, things fell into place, obstacles came up and were overcome, and now we’re going. Simple as that.
I’m almost done my work for the day, restoring integrity with my client work. I’m almost done the things I have been procrastinating on for weeks! It’s an awesome feeling. I still have a few hours to go, but it will be done before I turn in.
Again today, I didn’t create a financial miracle. I was in a disempowering place all day. I have a goal of restoring integrity with all of our financial obligations – getting our bills up to date. It is bringing up a lot of issues for me. I feel like I am a “bad person” for letting things get this out of hand, for compromising our financial situation this badly.
Right now, all told, I am probably $30,000 out of it – between old debt and currently behind bills. It is huge for me to even admit that publicly. No one really knows how far gone my personal financial situation really is.
And I will restore integrity there. I am powerful enough to create that.
Tomorrow is the day I create a financial miracle for our family. I will manifest $1,000 to pay an upcoming bill and cover some more expenses for our trip. That might even allow us to *gasp* *shock* go out for an adult meal with my brother in-law, leaving lil’ girl and my nephew, or go to a show, or do the tourist thing and visit some attractions. Maybe even take the kids out!
I know this is going to happen, and the neat thing is – I have no resistance to it. I say “I will manifest $1000 tomorrow” and my mind doesn’t tell me no, or that it is impossible, or that it is a huge number. There is complete silence in my mind. Which tells me that something is right about what I’m doing.
That is all for now… Back to work for me! Getting all of this work done tonight will really free up my mind to enjoy my first real vacation in 3 years. That is a long time to go without any R&R!
To the possibility of… possibility.
- C
There were roadblocks… There was almost a crying fit (yes, I’ll admit it… Even in today’s “if you’re going to be an entrepreneur, you can’t be emotional” world, I will admit to almost crying today.) I yelled at myself, almost gave up, and didn’t meet one of my goals.
But I met the other two.
I made three uncomfortable phonecalls today – one of which is resulting in a followup on Friday with one of the most influential organizations in our town.
I did yoga this morning, followed by a session of meditation – focusing on my power and my ability to create.
The only thing I didn’t do today was create a financial miracle. I can feel it in the works, and I know that this is coming from a lack mentality but – we really need it. There are bills that need to be paid in the next week, and something has to happen to get those paid.
Tomorrow, I have a meeting with the most influential tourism entity in our local area, to get feedback on our idea and concept, and perhaps even see if they would like to be involved.
My goal is to rock that meeting in a powerful way – unattached to the outcome, but knowing that something amazing will come from it.
My only other goal for tomorrow is to restore integrity with my client work. To complete the projects I have been procrastinating on before I go for that meeting (but after yoga and meditation, of course.)
Right now, this is all about small steps. Making baby steps to my pretirement life. That meeting tomorrow is the biggest baby step we’ve made so far – and I’ll continue the progress I’ve made with my own peaceful mind and attention.
Tomorrow is a big, full day – but I have time to do it all. To be sure of this, I’m going to bed now – at just after 10pm, far earlier than I usually do. I have to begin taking responsibility for my own pattern of staying up late to “enjoy life” and waking up late, which ends up creating a shortage of time.
So goodnight, blogging world. Here is to a fulfilling tomorrow.
- C
Those are the words I started my day with today. After my less-than-stellar evening last night, I decided to make today the perfect day. To focus on the things that are important to me, and live a fulfilling, joyful day in my life.
I’ve already met one of my objectives for the day – I did yoga and meditated.
Now, of course that looks very different from what it did in the land before babies. Before my daughter was born, I used to be able to sit down and meditate around the house whenever I felt like it. This time, I set aside a special time, I occupied her with toys and breakfast, went into the other room and got through all of my yoga – I felt great!
Then I sat down to meditate, eyes closed, focused on my breathing… Just entering that hyper-relaxed state, only to feel the sensation of a drumstick being played on my head and hear the sweetest little giggle. Even now I’m just laughing thinking about it – she is such a funny little kid.
I sat her down in front of me and got her to practice breathing with me – which she did for a few seconds, before eventually deciding that mommy was being boring and that playing the drumsticks on her own head was more interesting.
Oh yeah, part of this is because we got her a kid’s drum kit for her birthday. She loves it! She’s very musical, and this encourages her. We’re thinking of a keyboard or small piano for Christmas. By the time she hits kindergarden, we’re going to need an entire section of our house for musical instruments! Our electric guitar, her drums, our piano… Whats next, 4 foot bongos and a bass?
I let my lil’ girl play in the rain this morning. She snuck outside while I was getting some fresh air, and I thought to myself “I am about to get her dressed – what would be the harm?”
So I just let her wander out and play in the rain.
She stomped and splashed, licked raindrops, and watched as big drops fell. She loved it! When did we all lose our love of the rain?
Today is my perfect day. It is already perfect. I’m feeling the urge to go back to bed so that nothing ruins this day, but thats not going to happen. I’m going to live this day as perfect as it is, as perfect as it should be.
And I will create a financial miracle today. This is one of my goals over the next two weeks – to create a financial miracle. I have been told that even a small miracle is fine, which I will be open to – I’m not putting a sign on my door saying “only large miracles permitted!” But my focus will be on creating a large miracle. A game changing miracle. A miracle that makes the pay I receive for client work now like I should be using it to buy penny candy.
Why?
Because when you’re playing big games – like the ones I would like to play – the resource of money is a big part of the equation. It isn’t the only way, but it is one way – and since I know how to create this way, it is possible that the things I desire will come about this way.
I can create abundance. I am open to whatever opportunities the universe sends my way to live a life of my design with financial abundance.
So yesterday I did this exercise, inspired by the girls over at PretirementLiving.com. They are the ones who inspired me to take on this exercise: The Charmed Life Worksheet.
I actually designed it myself as a way to make sense of my life, and figure out where I’m spending my time. According to what they say, I’m probably spending 80% of my time doing things thatgive me 20% of my fulfillment in life – and only 20% of my time doing the things that give me 80% of my fulfillment in life.
So as part of this exercise, I had to write two headings on a piece of paper – on one side, write “What my life looks like now…” and on the other, “What a fulfilling life would look like for me…”
Then answer those questions, and take a long, hard look at the responses. So, here goes – this is me, doing the worksheet, right here on this blog.
What my life looks like now… (In other words, what tasks do I fill my day with.)
- House work
- Writing, managing and creating things for clients
- Sleeping
- Watching TV
- Daydreaming
- Wishing I spent more time with my daughter
- Cooking dinner if I have the energy
- About 20-30 minutes of quality time with lil’ girl and hubby.
What a fulfilling life would look like for me… (Or, what I would fill my days with – in a perfect world, if nothing held me back.)
- All the time I want with hubby and lil’ girl.
- Lots of time outdoors, travelling, and taking on new adventures.
- Contributing to my community more.
- Getting out and meeting new people, connecting with others.
- Meditating and doing yoga every day.
- Cooking and baking more.
- Writing more for myself than for clients.
- Waking up in the morning actually excited to start the day.
Those activities are fulfilling to me. They bring me joy – they make me happy. And yet it is so obvious that I’m only spending 20% of my time right now actually doing those things. I tell myself I’m too afraid to pick up the phone, go meet new people, network, give presentations, etc. – That I don’t have the money to do a bunch of those things. That I don’t have the time.
The funny thing is, all of that (and more) are possible just by designing the right business in the right way. And we have already done it – the business that hubby and I are creating together will give me all of that. Maybe not directly with certain things, but it will sure leave me the time to do those things.
But here I am instead, hiding behind my keyboard and my excuses. I tell myself that I’m too scared to pick up the phone and start making calls – and even if I did get brave enough to do it, my fear would come through on the phone and sabotage me. I tell myself that I’ve made so many obligations to my existing clients that I couldn’t possibly spend all of my time on this new venture – especially because it won’t succeed.
I actually tell myself it won’t succeed. I’m too afraid to let go of what is working financially to take action on what will work in every area of my life.
But then again, that is what I’m writing about. My journey to pre-tirement, a charmed life, a fulfilling way of being, from the perspective of a real person (me) and real problems.
Confidence is a huge issue for me. It is an issue in the way that I have none.
Other people see me as an eloquent speaker, a powerful communicator, and someone who has a “way with words.” I see my vocabulary as a way for compensating for my lack of confidence that there is actual value in what I have to say.
Other people say that I’m lucky to be doing what I’m doing – to be working from home, my hubby being a stay at home dad, my daughter running around me all day, working in my PJs and supporting my family.
I hate it.
I mean, I love having my daughter and husband around, and not having to deal with bosses and commuting and all of that. But every single day I have to do work that I find unfulfilling, boring, and to be honest, completely miserable – and I have to turn down my daughter’s requests to play, or my husbands requests for time, or my extended family’s requests for time, favours, and attention so that I can continue doing it.
Today is my starting point. Today is the day that I take charge of the direction of my life, and begin moving from this place that I am to the place that I want to be.
Today, I am overweight, inactive, miserable with most of my work, and feel that I don’t get enough time to do the things I enjoy – spending time with my family, being outdoors, exploring my spirituality, writing, etc.
Tomorrow, I am one step closer to living a life that I love. Pretiring – designing my business to suit my life, not to pay for it.
My action steps for tomorrow include actually waking up early and doing yoga, then meditating. And I have to make at least threee phonecalls for our joint business venture. It will be uncomfortable, but I know deep down that I can do it – I just have to get out of my own way.
To a happy and peaceful tomorrow…
- C
So, it has been over a year since I started this blog last April. Back then, I was pregnant, neurotic, creative, and needing an outlet. Today I am watching my daughter’s first birthday approaching with what could only be described as a mix of trepidation, excitement, and nausea.
She can’t be one. No. She is still a tiny baby, wrapped up in my arms. Toddler? Never!
*sigh* Okay, so she is going to be a year old soon. Even now my maternity leave would be ending, even though I never really had one. I’m working frantically to gain new freelance work, but have just now discovered that every proposal I’ve sent to a Craigslist or oDesk gig posting hasn’t even been received. The fact that out of over 15 proposals I had never even received a response was beginning to affect my self esteem until I realized that, and now I’m simply frustrated and *still* have only a few things on my calendar.
I have committed to bringing in $3000/month through my freelance business, while doing daycare for my best friend’s daughter and caring for my daughter, while hubby works outside of the home, and taking care of the house. Am I taking on too much?
I feel like I can never sleep, and I’m losing weight at a rate of close to 2 lbs/day. Then again, the last part of that I don’t entirely hate…
Am I alone? Please tell me I’m not alone…
It’s the first day of summer, and I’m sitting outside on my back porch researching wordpress themes for myself and a client. I’m trying to find the perfect design for Re-Think Recreation’s site, as well as a client of mine that I like to call “the un-accountant”.
I can’t think of a better way to be spending my afternoon!
That’s the great thing about finding something that you truly love to do. There is no part of it – even the accounting, marketing, or whatever part you currently find difficult/boring/hard/whatever about your business – no part of it at all that is a “chore”. When your business is your self-expression, marketing becomes exciting conversations… Accounting becomes an exercise in seeing how profitable you are… Sales are an opportunity to share yourself with others…
Your business and your life become intertwined and you no longer have to hate Monday mornings – or Tuesday afternoons!
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a neat theme to find and a little girl to cuddle in the sunshine!
Because following your head makes more sense.
Sometimes in life, you know what you’re supposed to do. In this case, it would be to panic.
I mean, to come to the realization that everything you’ve dedicated your life to for the past 7 years – what you honestly and truly believed you were meant to do and enjoyed – really isn’t what you were meant to do, and you didn’t enjoy it as much as you thought… That sucks.
To come to that realization with rent a month overdue, no sources of income, an unemployed husband and a 10 month old daughter to support – that sucks even more.
But the problem isn’t that I can’t “follow my heart” or “chase my dreams” (after all, my dreams aren’t running away – I don’t have to chase them. I just have to stop telling them to leave.)
The problem is that our society almost expects everyone to put what they want on the backburner to do what they have to do – and it almost never ends up working out anyway.
Let’s take an example… I’m sure you all know someone who has lost their job in the recession, right? And out of all of those people, there was probably someone, somewhere, who decided that they would use this as an opportunity to figure out what they really wanted to do, but before they could figure it out – they needed cash to support their family. What did they do? Probably go and find a job – any job.
And how did that work out?
Fired, laid off, quit, demoted, promoted, whatever – they didn’t stay in that job for very long.
One day, everyone comes to the realization that they aren’t doing what truly makes them happy. Sure, they might be doing something they enjoy, but a lot of the time, they wouldn’t be doing that if money and time were no object.
Take my husband for example – he started a business to work with seniors entering care when his own grandmother had terminal cancer. He knew a lot about the system, knew he wanted to learn more, recognized a need to help the caregivers (like his mom), and thought he could fill that need. But what would have happened if he had unlimited time and money when his grandmother went into care? Would he have started the same business? No – he wouldn’t have.
But now, we’ve finally figured out what we both should be doing – and we’re following our hearts.
Darren and I are building our own wilderness retreat, complete with rustic cabins, “backwoods style” camping, kids camps, and BBQ concessions on long weekends. On a lake. In the woods. Together. Starting right now.
For that and other reasons, mostly enrollment, the June Mompreneur Success Series is cancelled. I simply cannot dedicate myself to 3 months of group coaching calls with the limited enrollment we’ve had, while I’m going to be focusing so much on this project. Building a resort is no small feat – and it takes a lot of long hours and concentration to achieve. For those who have enrolled, I’ll be providing one year of one-on-one coaching by email – I am truly committed to your success!
I’ll still be providing coaching on a limited basis to the general public, and of course I’ll still be on this blog sharing business tips and stories about my life – but I’m going to be focusing on our resort for some time coming. The Marketing Mom Membership will be shut down as well. All existing members will get to continue with the video that is already up, but all PayPal subscriptions will be cancelled.
About working with my husband…
Everyone always has recommendations for married couples… Don’t work together, don’t spend too much time together, etc. etc.
Blah, blah, blah.
We work well together. Sure, it isn’t always smiles and fun – but what is? Our relationship not only survives working together, it thrives. We both grow as individuals, as well as growing as a couple. Plus there are no arguments over childcare, no missing each other, and better communication because we’re forced to put our crap to the side for the sake of our business.
This is our dream. We’ve talked about doing this since the day we met, and we’re doing it now. And it’s going to be amazing.
Readers, what is your dream? Why have you/haven’t you followed it?
Not all mom entrepreneurs are sole proprietors… No, many mom entrepreneurs are actually partners in a business with their significant other or other family members. Sometimes this makes a great solution for moms who need more flexibility with their work, but wish to work in a business that requires more time commitment than is possible while caring for a family full time.
Right now, this is what my husband and I are looking at. I love doing the training I provide here at CrunchyBusiness, but it basically just pays for itself right now – there isn’t a lot of profit yet. It will come in time, I suppose, but I’m making real differences for mom entrepreneurs and I feel that matters more for me than the bottom line.
Hubby and I have always had a dream – we’ve always wanted to run a campground. Dismissing the romantic notions of being able to sit around and make money while camping, we actually want to organize activities for campers, renovate, maintain, manage, schedule, decorate, and do the day to day operations of a campground. We love being outdoors, so this would be a great business.
It is also a business that costs $500,000+ cash (and a few million in capital from lenders or investors) to actually start – something we, like most of you, don’t exactly have just laying around.
To make that dream a possibility, we’re looking at what we can do together.
What strengths of his can I compliment? What passions do we share? What experience do we have that works with the other person’s experience?
Running a family business with your significant other gives you more time, more flexibility, and possibly a more profitable business (given the time resources available).
Have you ever considered running a business with your significant other? Do you? Share in the comments!
I’m feeling a little bit uninspired today… Maybe its from taking a weekend off, maybe its from being concerned about finances right now, maybe its PMS – who knows. In any case, I feel like I need to review some of what inspires me today…
I’m inspired by my husband, who has almost completely taken over the household chores in the last week so I can continue working.
I’m inspired by my daughter, whose smile can light up the world. I mean, just look at her – watching the hockey game in her jersey, cheering for the Canucks!
Speaking of which, I’m inspired by the Canucks… 40 years without a Stanley Cup, and they still play with heart. Hope this is your year, boys!
I am inspired by my mother, who managed to raise 3 kids, keep a house running, and keep a marriage together through all kinds of trouble.
I’m inspired by the thought that it won’t always be this hard. That maybe, next long weekend I’ll be able to take off and go camping with my family.
I’m inspired by my readers, who always have nice things to say, and (hopefully) take my advice and run with it!
I’m inspired by my secret project, because you’re all going to freaking love it!
I’m inspired by other moms who make this work.
I’m inspired by other moms who don’t – and instead stay at home without a business, or work outside of the home.
I’m inspired by the sunshine trying to peek through the clouds right now.
I’m inspired by the fact that I’m starting to finally smile a bit right now.
I’m inspired by the fact that this blog post is starting to write itself a bit more.
I’m inspired by cooking, and the possibility of blogging about some of the meals that I make – after all, this blog is for mom entrepreneurs. How many moms do you know who cook? EXACTLY!
I’m inspired by what inspires YOU – so tell me, mompreneurs – what inspires you?
